March 'HERstory' Month: Why Write Candace (In 1st person, 2nd person, or 3rd person)???

On the twenty-ninth day of August in the Year 1983, in the sixth hour upon 5 minutes in time;

Baby Candace

For unto Dabretta Latrese Whitehead and Theodist (sometimes it is spelled with a‘t’ and sometimes it not… the story is vague, but my grandfather name was/is Theodist Owens, Sr. and it started back then.

Ms. Windy City sophisticated Dabretta Latrese Whitehead

Mr. Cadillac driving and styling Theodist Owens, Jr

Southern Hospital-ity

Celebrating their UNION

I was told my cousin on my Father’s side but my Aunt on my Mother’s side (as you can see our family’s ties are deep and rooted) named me Candace, Latrese was given to me automatically (my Mother's middle name) and my last name was given by my Father. On my Mother’s side, there are a strong line of women who have all been a divine intervention and daily inspiration in my life’s journey. Our second male child in the family after my Uncle’s took 26 years to come. My Mother’s side is a blend of ‘wild windy city’ Chicago, Illinois and ‘State of the Art’ Arkansas. My Father’s side is a blend of good ole’ down-home southern hospitality and country-ality by way of Wabaseka, Arkansas and Keo, Arkansas.

The story of Candace Latrese Owens (did you notice my Mother and I have the same middle name? Well that was the least they could do since all my sisters’ (on my Mother’s side) names begin with a J. Interestingly, I found out in life that my name is in the bible in Acts 8:27. I will tell that story later in my sharing. To continue, This story has moments of Joy and Pain, Bitter and Sweet, UPs and downs, Ins and OUTs, Peace and Chaos… Balanced… I see…

My time (my favorite shirt with all different clocks on it)

A Mickey Mouse fan too (mostly because of Minnie mouse she was so kind to me in the show of course)

It was a life chosen to share at 33, however, I am a year late and a page short. 33, is a powerful time and one’s life. It represents so many pillars or transitions for so many other people in revolutionary history or HERSTORY (televised). Candace seeks to save the world starting with HERself, HER family, HER friends, and last but least, HER foes. Every word or thought is her passionate attempt to express her story with good intent; to give HER reader or hearer a thorough but simple account of HER lively case. She will share the names of HER my parents will always be with me and in my movement for did help with my growth process in some or most form for the time expected and I am eternally grateful. All other names have no reason to be named or mentioned. However, she gives their position in HER life and they rotated around HER. She has not ill-will of ANY in which she speaks of for she has died and transitioned to another state of HER existence or being which is the reason she writes and shares these moments in time NOW at the dawn of 33 (which as I stated previous I began to write this account at the dawn of 33 but I am a year late and a page short of publishing.

WHY WRITE CANDACE?

A question and a statement, Candace, biblically speaking in Acts, chapter 8: Verse 26-31 states:

And the angel of the Lord spake unto Philip, saying, Arise, and go toward the south unto the way that goeth down from Jerusalem (there is a Jerusalem in Arkansas, which is was interesting as well) unto Gaza, which desert.

And he arose and went: and behold a man of Ethiopia, a enuch of great authority under Candace, queen of the Ethiopians, who had the charge of all her treasure, and had come to Jerusalem for the worship.

Was returning and sitting in his chariot. Read Isaiah the Prophet. Then the spirit said unto Philip, Go near, and join thyself to this chariot.

And Philip ran thither to him, and heard him read the prophet Isaiah, and said, Understandest thou what thou readest?

And he said, how can I except some man should guide me? And he desired Philip that he would come up and sit with him.

This scripture spoke volumes to me years ago and it was from this scripture I gained the inspiration, strength to journey as a Queen regardless of the presence of a King (you were born with that right -birthright) no man or woman can take that from you except you so why not write and share my line of Queens in me and motivate others to crown themselves as well. To add to that fact, my blood and only biological brother by my Father (we have different Mother's but he is indeed my brother... little BIG brother at that) is name Philip and spelled the same way as it spelled in the bible.

On another note, my Father name is Theodist, the prefix is Theo, which Greek for God, during my college years I pledged a Greek Sorority and became very active and read The Stolen Legacy by George G.M. James (who taught at U of A-Pine Bluff).

Neither here nor there, I know my parents had me for a reason and I have no regrets on my journey it has molded and shaped me into a refined ‘piece’ PEACE of clay. I am eternally grateful for their sacrifice and am humble to travel through their DNA and seek to perfect it with each spark of LIGHT and LOVE.

So, WHY WRITE?

Because my life depends on it, I do not have any children at this moment in time and the children that have seen, heard, or know me KNOW I emit love and always make them respect their selves and their elders and MOST of all each other. For them I write, for my many younger cousins that call me the weird cousin, for my Earthly Mother and Father… My life depends on it….

Once upon a time not long ago, lifestyles of the Hood and Shameless (Eastgate, Silver-City Courts, and then there was Dixie)

Dixie was the most interesting time in my life I remember one story that I share with many young women who favor the fast life. So many students think I must smoke week I have locks and well smoking runs in the family (not necessarily weed cigarette smoke and most of that is from bad nerves from down southern jail house blues, street blues and just old habits die old blues. We (my mother, my sisters , and I had just recently moved back to the city after needing some time away from Arkansas and decided to join my Uncle and his family in Corpus Christi, Texas. Now, we have skipped long hospital visits from me falling and hurting myself about to be taking by social services because they thought I was being beaten but I was really clumsy. The Lisa Frank Diaries, my big brown teddy, tons of whippings’, old whitey (my grandmother’s friend’s truck) crawdad fishing, crickets and bait, cousins, hide go get it, and so much more other childhood memories. All were a mere memory when we got back to Arkansas, we were so different and I talked like a proper white girl let the hood tell it not that I meant to I didn’t even notice it until they said it. So I have three stories that changed my life during this time but they were all in relation to the many reasons I was bullied or treated mean for.

I am new to the school, to the neighborhood and to the streets, I was approached by a very poor looking man needless to say it was a cover up because he had money and he thought I was supposed to drop everything and not read but grab that dough and let him continue to poison our neighborhood with his drug money. I told him that too. I asked him why I would want any money from you when that money is killing our people he smiled and him and his friend walked away because the bus was coming up the street. Well, apparently, I was stuck up from that point until I was bullied and forced to defend myself wholehearted and fistedly. Which brings me to the next story, one day on the bus I notice that I am being hit with a piece of paper every so and so. I finally look back and see two girls throwing paper balls at me. Well, after I got off the bus I was immediately confronted. NOW, let’s go back, during 7^th grade I met the seemingly quietest and shy young man I had ever met. Only to find out that he was WANTED by a few people that I was not aware of because I was barely aware that he liked me because he was shy. Well, he had admirers that thought I was getting in the way and since they had already thought I was stuck up the bullying was in order. Needless to say, one of the girls started to push me and I kept asking why and she just kept pushing so I hit her and then her friend jumped in then her friend brother jumped in. It was CRAZY! I went home and went to sleep and soon after I heard a knock on my door, my Mother was asking did I get in fight and I said yes and she said get up! I was sure how she found out (I said now my cousin didn’t jump in but she told on me), fortunately, the older generation in Dixie was more community minded and her parents wanted to know who we were and why I hurt their daughter. My Mother does not like people to question her so I didn’t know if she was going to tell the lady or not but I guess it is only US (her children) that she didn’t want to question her because she explained more than I thought she would. She stated the house was giving to my Grandfather and my Grandfather had left it to his three children and since my Mother is the oldest she decided to keep it and take care of it. I explained how they jumped me and I had the neighborhood day care to be a witness and her parents said she would be punished and that they were sorry that she behaved that way she knew better. I have many stories I could share but these are life changing for me, after these incidents I became very close to one person that really got me and really was easy to talk to. She was my friend and I knew it when she took two blows for me. A boy on the bus stop was being mean to me and of course if I don’t talk to them they say I’m stuck up and Kim had my back she told him if you bad and want to fight girl fight me. He hit her two times in the face and it was so hard I knew she was hurt badly and she just stood there she became my shero that day and I made sure to carry a knife to the bus stop after that day because I said to myself if anybody touch her or me I am going to stab them to death. I miss her so much. She is my sister!

There’s pep squad, dance, cheerleading, Fights and bullying, my first kiss in 7^th grade and my first time with the same young man in 9^th grade, his baby in 8^th grade (which I found out in 9^th grade), game fight out, Tandy 10 theater fight, and THE CHICK!

My first job, Chic-Fil-A, I had started working at Chic-Fil-A thanks to a team leader friend of mine from the dance team, it was a conspiracy, they fired me for ice cream they stated I was stealing ice cream because I ate it on my lunch and didn’t pay for it until after my shift. I couldn’t believe it my black bozo sketchers, my red shirt and those flour looking black jeans were gone from my life. I put all my energy in dancing and my friends and a little work as well…lol… I began to work harder during my Junior year more than any other time. I used to wait until the last minute to show how much I really knew something or wanted something like that A in Probability and Statistics I went from a F to an B by the end of the semester I was doing good but not good enough fast enough I only got a B (a high B but only a B). The S.T.A.R.S. program, TOT (teachers of tomorrow), FBLA (future business leaders of america) and Who’s Who were some of my clubs and achievements.

My first baby and last abortion, I vowed never take my love away from me again, but after I found the father of my child lacking interest and having another baby and finding out I was as well and starting school in August 2001 with dance team to finish as Captain and really no financial support at the time I panicked and aborted my baby. I went on to UAPB appointed Freshman class president, joined an African centered study group, pledged Zeta Phi Beta, became Secretary and Step Coordinator, joined Showstoppers Dance Society, went on to attempt to run for senior class president but I was humble to award the young lady who was chosen she deserved it. I graduated soon after getting my approval to change my major to General Studies because I lack the interest in Teaching. Vegetarian/Vegan transition, The BIG hair chop, Natural Lifestyle changes, Loans, Financial aid, roommates, babysitting, sister leaving for Japan, homosexual relationship and farewell, moving out and own my own with bills and responsibilities.

Honoring my PERFECT attendance and HONOR ROLL

CELEBRATION TIME... Glenview in North Little Rock

Panthers GO!

The Charging Wildcats

Who are you rooting for... UAPB!

It is different World!

I’sa woman now

The year is 2007 and I have been introduced to a new way of walking and a new way of talking. I was now a first time family graduate, with a passion again for teaching I applied for my first full time teaching assistant position at Lynch Drive Elementary and started working with Home school Associations and community based educating. It was different and I was very intrigued and engulfed in a new language, a new people, and customs (culture) while still maintaining my teaching position I worked with the home schools to better provide a well rounded stance in knowledge and to better myself as well. I was introduced to business incorporating and opened my own home based part time business selling African products, I began hosting a talk show to educate the masses effective with another member of the African study group mention previously, I began writing and crafting. I set out to have my first book written by the year 2008 but I began to work very closely to the co host mentioned previously and we became partners and with his children and the children at work and the home school children I became second and my book was not completed until October 2013. I compiled my second book in 2014 and co wrote two other books in 2015 and 2016 under the pen name Bennu Ankh Re. I was honored to be a part of Black Women Independent films. Many rivers to cross in and at Pine Bluff, Arkansas; Kerr, Arkansas; Macon, Georgia; Maumelle, Arkansas; my Mother’s; my Sister’s, ; my Father’s I found my way back home… My biological family calls me Candace, Candy, CandyFaye, Smooth Face, and Latrese. My spiritual family calls me Bennu Ankh Re, some of business endeavors call me Dr. Bennu, Bennu, Dr. Re, some call me Badu Bennu or Badu, and others have aspired and transitioned to call me by my sacred name for energy work. All of them are me… and I am them.